My Reason

Today, the 17th of January was a special day. It was not significant because of an anniversary or of a day that has been marked down in history. This morning I woke to something I want to have every day for the rest of my life, this morning I threw everything away to just do exactly what I wanted, this morning I made a decision to be who I want to be for the rest of my years and a decision that I'll always hope to hold on to. For once, I let it rain just to rain, for once I pulled the hair away from my face and smiled because I am so blessed and I am so in love. And every moment that I live and breathe with him I am better, every moment I am near him and every moment I am alive, I can't help but think how lucky I am, how fortunate I am to be able to love, especially after I thought I had closed off my heart. So many people have told me they have seen such a change in me, in my writing and how I seem so happy and content with everything I have. They tell me they were scared for a while, that I was a little edgy, a little "dark." And yes I was, I'll admit it, I had my life ripped away from me for the second time in a few young years, and yes it was a challenge... but I triumphed through it and I could not be happier. There is one specific reason that I am who I am right now and it's you... it's you who would do anything to make me happy, you who takes me to the riverfront, who takes time to play Gin with me; you who buys me orchids and who always walks me to my car. It is you who leaves me little notes and icards to wake up to, who gave me the key to your heart and who tells me I'm beautiful even when I feel like I have no hope. There is one reason I am who I am today and one reason that I am a little less "dark," and more hopeful than I have ever been. There is one reason why I am the woman I'm growing to be and one reason that I have been able to open my heart to love... my reason is you.