At the End of the Day

Tonight, I sit here in my apartment looking out of the thousands of tiny lights of Honolulu, over the dark ocean, over hundreds of people living their lives, in thousands of different ways. I sit here overlooking those that are religious, those that haven't ever set foot in a church in their lives; women and men, children and adults; those that are gay and those that are straight; those that are white, black, Hawaiian, Asian. And as I sit here, in my mind are the millions of comments made by people over the years, some more recently than others, that come up with ways to hold some back and put others ahead. For the first time today though, I heard something truly profound, something that truly made me sit here and write this tonight, something that coming from a mother, from a wife, from a woman that made me sit back and truly appreciate my beliefs even more.

I sit here as a young woman, a woman that believes full heartedly in the rights of gay marriage, in women's rights and equal opportunities. I sit here having friends of all races, of a young woman in the working community that deals with derogatory comments made toward groups of people every day. And in a world in such a mess, sometimes I can't help but just sit back and wonder where we went wrong. When we have a woman that would tell you that she's a Christian, that attends church regularly, the mother of a son who has come out as being gay, that she could sit there and look me in the face and tell me that gay marriage shouldn't be allowed because the only reason for marriage is to have children. It made me sick that such a theory even exists in our world today, that someone could even come up with that reason, as an excuse, as a way to say that that's the reason that two people that love each other, regardless of race or gender or ethnicity, should be stopped from having the civil liberties that the straight community has. I ask you tonight, if the tables were flipped, if you were in that position, leaving gender and race aside, letting emotions take the lead, letting your heart feel, and if you loved someone, why should you have to give up that union?

I could also raise the point of myself... am I subject to that rule as well then? As a young woman that doesn't want to have children of my own, knowing at an early age that that life isn't meant for me, should I not be allowed to be married either? Should I have my liberties taken away because of who I am? I think we get so off track in our society, we forget to give each other the benefit of being different, of wanting different things in life. Not all girls grow up wanting the fairy tale wedding and the perfect two little kids running around the big house in the suburbs. I've never wanted that, that was the never the life for me.

We are not all the same, nor should we be. Yet we should have respect for each other at least, respect enough to believe that God loves us all equally, that he doesn't pick and choose who can love and who can't, that he doesn't look down and say because you fell in love with someone, that that makes you anything less than anyone else. He doesn't discriminate - we do.

I think that there are moments in life when you really realize who a person is. It may be after just meeting them, or it might be years and years down the road. But in that moment you see the real person they are, and so often the people I see are a disgrace to this world we live in, and it's people like that, comments like that, that are the worse sins of all. I may not be the perfect person, and I have made my own share of many mistakes, but I believe we all deserve the right to be happy, no matter gay or straight, man or woman, houses in the suburbs or apartments in the city, whatever we are, whoever we become, if our lives don't hurt other people, if we live as good people and help this world to be a better place than what harm does a union between two people that love each other cause?

And at the end of the day, I have to wonder, in this world that seems to take 1 step forward and 10 steps back, how is it that we got to the point where loving someone isn't allowed? I'm not asking us to move mountains, or to change your beliefs, or to give up your own rights at all - I'm asking you to think about if it was you, or your son or daughter, or your brother or your friend. Shouldn't we all be allowed to be happy, to marry the people we love, to become the people we are, gay or straight, women that want children of their own and women that don't? When did wanting to spend your life with someone become wrong?