lOSt

Sometimes the world makes you feel so small and insignificant; sometimes I feel lost in the swirl of life and this week I have been lost. For the first time in a long time this past week has hit me hard, and maybe it's me, maybe I was too spoiled there for a while, too happy. But lately it's been a struggle for me, lately those tears that used to be so common in my eyes have returned, and the only thing that keeps me going, knowing that there is more happiness left for me is you. You are the one who revives me just by hearing your voice, just by bringing me roses, just by understanding my hurt. I know life will get better, I know my fears will reside, but right now, bare with me for my fears are many these past few days. I'm scared to be who I am, I'm scared to tell my father how I feel, I'm scared to be alone for a month, I'm scared that I will fail and more hell will be raised. I'm so unsure lately, a feeling I haven't had for a long time. When will my world be stable again, when will I learn to live again? I know it will come, I just have to learn from these bitter days, I have to understand that good will come again, because I know it will. And if you were not here, I don't know what I would do. I don't know how I ever got on without you and when you wipe away my tears and hold me in your arms, I know for sure things will get better.... I know for sure that my fears will go away.